The Ellen Show has lost a million viewers since her apology: How to win back your audience


icymi, Ellen got some bad press a while back, and someone crunched the numbers... her ratings have dropped significantly.
A million less viewers is never fantastic, but when it represents like maybe a third or even half of your viewers, that aint good y'all.


idk too much about Ellen... whether she's mean, nice, a combination of the two (I'm calling it mice)... but here are some winning strategies for someone who's lost a million viewers... 
- Locate and Visit all one million people who stopped watching. Win them over with: sparkling personality, money and prizes, hypnosis, or the best damn dancing they've ever seen!
- Hire some muscle to start "crackin' kneecaps" of the audience of other shows until your viewers are the only ones remaining. Make sure your viewers know that "they could be next."
- Three words: robots, robots, robots!

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